“Am I going to have big ‘M’ carved on my head for the rest of my life or will things get better or won’t it matter eventually?”
The answer is a big, fat YES – THINGS WILL GET BETTER!!!! In past blogs, I’ve compared my meth experience to a scar on my knee – it’s there, it’s not horrible or disfiguring, and other people don’t notice it and if by chance they do, it looks like any other scar. YOU know what it is but unless you go around pointing it out and talking about it (or blogging about it), it is just a scar (Read ‘My Scar).
HOWEVER, it takes time before it comes before a scar. QUITTING METH IS HARD but DOABLE. Depending how long you used and how many life changes you need to make after quitting will determine how quickly it becomes a scar. Just like after a big knee scrape and the scab falls off, you don’t notice until later that it’s left a scar. And your meth experience is same way. While you are dealing with the stages of coming down (Read about the 5 stages of coming down here) and are working on rebuilding your new life and relationships, your wound is healing. Support and accountability is necessary. I talk about the importance of this in my recovery plan.
If you have an addict in your life, this is important for you to understand as well. Your addict has a lot on his/her plate to return to normal life. QUITTING METH IS HARD but DOABLE. There is a large wound full of cravings, sickness, desire, and loss that your addict is going to experience before you see their ‘normal life’ take shape. You can help them not see that big ‘M’ in his/her head by being supportive but not enabling, loving, and non judgmental. Have you been through coming down from meth? YES, I realize that your addict may have caused you A LOT OF PAIN and GRIEF – so the question is, do you want them back? Do you think that by reminding them of the big “M’ on his/her head is going to help them get back on track? If you can’t let yourself be close and supportive, you can at least encourage them to seek support and continue to be positive in his/her recovery. Every encouraging word is helpful. Just remember, do them a huge favor and don’t talk about weight (Read my reason why not to talk about weight).
My final thought for you is a beautiful text that promises a beautiful normal life after you stop looking at the big “M’ carved in your head. It’s found in Job 10:12, “You have granted me life and favor, and Your care has preserved my spirit.”
Peace, til next time.
My recommended reading for this blog is a wonderful book by someone who I really admire, Cheri Peters. The big ‘M’ on your forehead will soon disappear when you realize how much you are worth outside of your addiction. Please read and enjoy. Let me know if you found it useful in getting rid of that big ‘M’.