Did You Know You Can Buy a Meth Pipe at the Cash Register Counter?

Did You Know You Can Buy a Meth Pipe at the Cash Register Counter?

Look, I’m certainly not telling you this to give you any ideas. This piece is more for someone who doesn’t know how easy it is to get paraphernalia. Maybe you are wondering where on earth addicts get those strange looking pipes not realizing that you are buying your milk right next to a meth pipe. […]

Dealing with Meth Dreams and Cravings: We All Have Them But It Doesn’t Mean Backsliding.

Dealing with Meth Dreams and Cravings: We All Have Them But It Doesn’t Mean Backsliding.

“I’ve been clean 9 months and still get cravings. They are especially bad after dreams of using.” I already am a vivid dreamer and when I was younger, I use to sleep-walk a lot. My nighttime activity was sometimes more active than I would be during the wake hours! I can remember some dreams that […]

Been Clean For a Week and It’s Just Not Worth It”

Been Clean For a Week and It’s Just Not Worth It”

“Been clean for a week and my body is still feeling the aftershock. It’s just not worth it” If you’ve quit or ran out of meth, you KNOW this feeling. This is what meth does. This is the hold that meth has. ‘Aftershock’ is a great descriptive word to depict just how bad you feel […]

A Roof for Six Months

A Roof for Six Months

“I’ve been living on the edge of not knowing of my housing status for the last 2 months but I can finally relax for at least the next 6.” This statement conveys a small ray of hope for someone who is using still or trying to quit and get their life back on track. Meth […]

When You Realize You Can’t Quit.

When You Realize You Can’t Quit.

“You wake up one day and look back at everyday use and realize you can’t stop.” That was a scary day. The feeling of desperation turned my empty stomach into knots. I thought for sure I was in control. I could stop if I WANTED to. Nope. That’s not the way this drug works. I […]

Meth Plus Accidents Equal Stupid

Meth Plus Accidents Equal Stupid

Accidents happen but when accidents happen and you’re tweaking, it can get serious fast. When you’re not thinking when you should be, you end up paying for it in the end. I’m lucky that it’s only a sore back. It was a cold, January day, and I was out in our arena with the horses. […]

Dilemmas of Coming Down

Dilemmas of Coming Down

“The option of rehab is still available, and I guess I’ll still think about it but there are a couple problems… So if I go, I have to come home to my boyfriend using and force myself to not use, and my son doesn’t know I ever started it again.” Dilemmas of coming down When […]

ISOLATED

ISOLATED

“I have isolated myself from family and friends. I rather be alone and struggle than for anyone to find out I have a problem.” Do you feel like this? It is one thing being isolated from family and friends because of location and circumstances but it’s a whole other situation where you isolate YOURSELF from […]

Throwing Rocks at 2am.

Throwing Rocks at 2am.

This is a new tag for me; ‘things I did while tweaking’. The purpose of this tag is continue my plight to bare all, make the tweaker smile at the odd things they have done while tweaking, and help some families/friends with throwing up a red flag if they witness some odd behavior. Because, honestly, […]

Feeling My Body Shutting Down.

Feeling My Body Shutting Down.

“I stepped out of bed after not sleeping all night, to get up and go to work, my face sunk in and heavy, my heart hurting, tired, dazed, gotta do another line…get to work, go hide in the bathroom to do another line, gotta rush home to do more dope, not eating, not drinking, no […]